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the need to live in the present and not the past. If your husband could be willing to try to take your ex at face value in the here and now, just as a father trying to have a relationship with his daughter- then you all can chart a course from there. BUT there are intricacies to this situation. If your relationshipnwith the ex really was toxic, perhaps DH feels protectively toward you. How do you react/behave when texting with the ex? If he ruffles your feathers and DH sees this, it's understandable how he feels. Does DH speak ill of the ex in front of your daughter? Does she pick up onnany of the tension of the situation? As a step-mother myself, I believe one thing above all -: a deserves to feel like all her parent figures are on the same, working together as a team. She deserves to feel that everyone is focused on what is best for her. We've had some rough times with DH's ex, but all the communication of "issues" happens over. When we meet up in person it's always pleasant, and my stepdaughter believes her mom and I are good friends. The poster who said that marrying someone with a was a package deal could not have been more right. I you come to some understanding with DH and the ex.
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